Step 3: Create a Personal identity

Once your dream has been discovered, and the next stage of your life is defined, it must move from a concept, a dream, into a very present day reality. To begin that, you need to first truly own it, long before you even begin the process of making it a reality. “I would like to be a speaker.” feels dramatically different in your body that “I am a speaker.”

I worked with a woman who presented as wanting to become a teacher. She felt it was what she was called to do yet she had no idea where to even begin. Her approach was longing, hopeful, and fearful that it wouldn't happen.  I had her, each day, spend 5 minutes in meditation or reflection, in owning that she was a teacher, it was in her blood, she now simply needed the training and qualifications to do what she came here to do. More than once she told me that this attitude caused her to see the obstacles that arose as inconveniences rather than as stopping blocks that would prove she was on the wrong track.

Research has shown us that between 60 – 90 days is what it takes to shift a habit or a belief. Owning that new reality, “I am retiring”, “I am moving”, “I am a speaker” causes all the existing fears to come up in order to be dealt with rather than having them unconsciously sabotage your dreams. This clears the way.  

Form that new identity and you will begin to experience the freedom, expansion, and unlimited possibility it provides. 

Dorothy A. Martin-Neville, PhD, is a motivational speaker, author, coach, and psychotherapist who has spent her career helping others, through humor and faith, claim their dreams, eliminate self-sabotage, and become everything they were meant to be.

She can be reached at: drdorothyct.com    dorothy@drdorothyct.com   860-543-5629