What is Your Communication LifeStyle?

By Carolyn Finch

As I waited at the stop sign for the children to
get off the bus, I noticed a mother with a stroller and a sleeping baby waiting at the bus stop. I was only about 15 feet from the front of the bus and could see parents standing around. This mother was holding her smart phone with her head bent downward and at times would stop and then text  or enter a number and then the phone went back up to her ear. I never saw her check on the baby in the stroller nor did she look up. Soon a cute little light skinned boy with curly brown hair about 5 or 6 years old jumped off the bus and waved a paper with a painting at his mother. Mom paid no attention to the boy so he grabbed her leg and shouted "look mom look mom"
She looked down at him and shouted "I told you not to talk to me when I'm on the phone."

My heart sank and I wanted to cry as I'm sure that the little boy wanted to do. What an ideal time for communication. This amazing transition time when a child is enthusiastic about something he has created and at the same time happy to be getting home from school. Was this a dysfunctional communication moment?  It certainly appeared that way. Would this be the base to poor communication for the next few minutes, hours and maybe even days?

The  one major aspect of being a human being is that we are able to communicate orally. Have we forgotten to be thankful for this gift of true conversation? With the advent of smart phones we have a new addiction. Research shows that the average person with a smartphone texts an average of 100 time a day wow! This type of communication determines our lifestyle and our lifestyle determines our communication.

If we have an addiction of any kind such as shopping, drinking, drugs, sickness, foods whatever,
our typical conversation will include words, phrases and stories related to our addiction. Doesn't sound like a learning listener and quality conversation to me. Therefore my challenge to you as a Blog reader is to look at everyone you speak with, eye to eye and belly to belly. This way you will be listening to the other person and as a reward you will learn something from what they say. So add to your communication lifestyle the ability to listen with your eyes.

You can improve your communication by helping yourself become more enlightened after hearing me speak at your next conference. Call now for more information or for  a one on one Speech Coaching session.203 405 3972.

Carolyn Finch Body Language and Communication LifeStyle Expert TM
Professional Speaker who will put a SPARK in your next meeting!       carolyn@carolynfinch.com

HAPPY NEW YOU

Welcome to a new day, a new year and a new you. I truly believe that this year is going to be absolutely amazing.  Do you remember saying to someone “I learn something new every day?” If that is true then you have learned 365 things last year and now it is up to you to put them into practice. Ah there’s the rub. It is very difficult to change our habits. Especially when we are overwhelmed. No matter how hard we work at it we have to;

 1. Take action.
 2. Believe in ourselves.
 3. Create workable solutions

Actually you can take a piece of paper and write down some of the outstanding happenings in your life last year. You are in luck if you keep a log, Journal or have a calendar in your phone, in a planner, on the wall or on line. Still seems overwhelming doesn’t it?

At the end of each month I write up a monthly review of everything that has happened during the month. Obviously we don’t have everything written down because it would be too much information. I highlight the important issues based on people I have met, activities that I have done and ideas that have come into my mind.

Many years our New Year’s Resolutions fall by the wayside and never get completed. I am speaking from years of experience. However, I have changed and also learned the secret to change.  We become enthusiastic and so do our friends and associates. There are more people attending the gym or Y in January. More people go to church and because budgets may be less, fewer items are being brought into homes in January.

Make three New Year’s resolutions and keep them small so you have a possibility of creating ways to achieve them.  Make one that requires full body action. After I have lost 5 pounds I will reward myself by going to the theater with a friend to see Star Wars or whatever you decide. Saying you will lose weight is too big, broad and overwhelming.
The second New Year Resolution is to believe in yourself. Therefore it is time to write to yourself and tell yourself how wonderful you are/ Go ahead I dare you! Now your third resolution is to create a workable solution. Start with only one. Mine is to find more time in my day by delegating the food shopping to my husband and now it is up to him to reach his goal.

Remember you want to: 1. Take action 2. Believe in yourself and 3. Create a workable solution. Keep a calendar on the wall.

 Professional Speaker - Trainer - Facilitator  carolyn@carolynfinch.com 

  203 405 3972